Friday, March 6, 2009


First off a "SPOILER ALERT" second...

PARENTS...Watchmen is NOT a comic adapted movie like Superman! It's rated R for a reason there IS NUDITY...full frontal male and female nudity and that's just the tip of the iceberg, so please research what your kids are going to see before you go to the movies or rent a flick.

Now, I admit I haven't read the Watchmen graphic novel yet, so I am reviewing this movie as a Watchmen virgin.

Right up front I have to say the only thing that I didn't like about this movie was having a poorly designed marketing gimmick thrown in my face at midnight after waiting for three hours to see the movie. (Regal cinemas decided that it would be a good idea to abruptly turn on the lights in the middle of the movie previews in order to raffle off a black tee shirt ) (not a Watchmen shirt)... two (yes only two) movie posters and a ???calculator???WTF?

The raffle tickets apparently hadn't been handed out to everyone, so half the theater had their hands up requesting tickets which took extra time and then, to top it off, the Regal Cinemas employee who was conducting the raffle obviously had no public speaking experience which made the whole situation slow, awkward and uncomfortable.

The movie on the other hand was absolutely amazing! I haven't seen a movie so creative and artistic in....well since Coraline. The beginning was a little slow as the characters were introduced and their backgrounds and histories explored but then the movie really took off.

I guess the pace of the film could be equated to really great sex.
You begin slowly, touching gently, with a little teasing heightening the anticipation, then a little nibble here, a sharp nip there, followed by a long deep stroke to start your pulse pounding and you body throbbing. Then back to gentle caresses, hands stroking, backs arching...before a sharp slap on your ass makes you scream and buck...(You get the picture )

The story was sweet one minute and brutal the next, the extremes almost physically knocked the wind out of me. I've never seen such a range of emotional scenes played so well, for example, in one scene, one of the Watchmen, Rorschach, is being quizzed by a shrink. The shrink shows him a card with an inkblot on it and asks him what he sees. Rorschach claims he sees a butterfly however, we are shown through his memories that what he sees is actually his mother being ravished by a strange man and then cruelly slapping young Rorschach, telling him that he should have been aborted as a baby.

The soundtrack is alternatively dark and moody and fast and intense and really helps the scenes.

Overall I loved it, I give it 5 stars and two opposable thumbs up and plan to buy it along with The Dark Knight, Iron Man, Coraline and Serenity.